The Recipe 1 - The Rice Patty Sato Sato Du Lait!!!
by TBOtaku
Summary: PG for some cussing and some bad influence stuff. IF YOU CAN'T USE A STOVE WITHOUT BURNING YOURSELF, GET THE HECK AWAY FROM THIS FILE!!!! TBOtaku gleefully begins a whole new variety of fic- the Recipe fic!! WOO~~ Read, obviously.


Recipe 1  
  
The Fana-tic Works of TBOtaku (My Gahd, what have we done. BWAH!!!!)  
  
~~~  
  
I'll name it now!!!! *wields her spatula of pom~!*  
  
ABRACADABRA...YOU ARE THE ULTIMATE RICE PATTY SATO SATO DU LAIT--!!!!!!!!  
  
(More to come after a YUMMSH dinner of macaroni & cheese and...something else!! woowoo!!) ^_~V" ^_^= -yum, yum!!!!  
  
...And....I'M BACK!!!! ^_^ ^_^ Aren't you glad to see me...  
  
DO NOT ANSWER ABOVE QUESTION. UNLESS YOU SAID "YES!!!!!!!!!! YES, _PLEASE_; TAKE MY MONEY!!!!! TAKEITTAKEITTAKEIT--"  
  
Hee. Hee. Hee. Hee-  
  
*smack*  
  
I'm better now.  
  
Recipe 1- (finally...)  
  
1.) (I must seem to love this number-AHH!! *dodges flying eyebeam laser from The DO-NOT-RANT-DAMNIT(!!!!) Conscience(Con Science!! Te Hee!! Oxymoron, aint it--AHH!!!)  
  
...  
  
1.) Do not listen to TBOtaku.  
2.) Erase 1.).  
3.) DO IT NOW!!!!!!!!   
  
*Drizzt TAKES OVER!!!! GOGOGO WE ARE UNDER ATTACK!!!!* (sorry StarCraft lame family joke...yes, we are all like this...-_-;; BUT IT'S GOOD!!!! WEEE!!!! O.O eyes the scimitars warily and shuts up*)  
  
Drizzt: A-hmm. *clears throat*  
Drizzt: Umm...Why, exactly, did you put the action after the sound? o.O  
Moi: YOU MADE A CUTE FACE!!!! COME HERE, YOU!!!! AWHHHHHHH  
Drizzt: Gaah! *shudders* Nevermind...  
  
*Drizzt rummages around in his cloak and finds a nice shiny blunt object for TBOtaku to play with. He throws it to her.*  
  
TBO: WEE!!! WEEWEEWEEWEE!!!!! V^__^V  
  
Drizzt: *sighs* Now, without wasting any more time, let's get to the Recipe...*draws back a curtain and the crowd "oooh"'s*  
  
(Drizzt holding a spatula and a pan)  
1.) Turn on your stove (or someone else's, HECK!! JUST TURN ON A ST--AACK!!) to about HIGH.  
2.) Wait a second. Fifteen or so...  
3.) Splash a small amount of milk in. Maybe a large splash.  
4.) Not very concise, are we?  
5.) Watch the milk sizzle and bubble for a bit. Oooohhhh...Ruby Pendant-like...*smacksmacksmacksmack*  
6.) Take some rice porridge and, with a spatula, uh...spatula however the heck much you want into the pan. Btw, yeah, you have to make the porridge ahead of time. ForGIVE me. (Well, alright, fine. Instructions on making rice porridge: Put WASHED (PLEASE.) rice and some (a large quantity?? More than rice?? ^^;; ^^;;) water in small pot. Put a lid on it. Turn to MEDIUM (???) . Leave it there until you want to check on it. Preferably before it all bubbles over and goes to hell, please.)  
7.) Add ample amounts of SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR!!!! Which is SATO in Japanese!!!!  
8.) With spatula (again? yes.) , keep scraping the whole mass around and wait for little minute-or-so intervals between each folding and scraping session, which I am sure that your little future meal (ha!) enjoys greatly.  
9.) After about 25 minutes of this, it should start getting thick. Real thick. And I mean REEEAAAAL thick. DON'T TAKE IT OFF THE STOVE TOO QUICKLY!!!! LEAVE IT THERE UNTIL IT'S SO THICK THAT YEAH!!!!!!!! NYAR!!!!   
  
Drizzt: She's always like this. ForGIVE me.  
Drizzt: *blinkblink* My Menzoberranzan. SHE MUST BE RUBBING OFF ON ME!! *gasp* AND NOW I'M YELLING!!!!   
  
Moi: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!! AND YOU'RE DOING THE FACE, TOO!!!! *points and guffaws hysterically in triumph. YEARS OF WORK FINALLY PAYED OFF!!!!!!!!*  
  
10.) Scrape the contents of the pan into a little roundish shape by first making it a square, then flipping it (it doesn't actually flip, but TRY. TRY.) a few times. Btw, USE A NON-STICK PAN. OR YOU WILL BE SORRY INDEED. BuwwoahahaahAAhAHAHaahaHAHAAAA...  
  
11.) Take a plate(small) and spatula-transfer the rice-object onto the plate.  
  
12.) Now you can either eat it and burn yourself like the IDIOT YOU ARE IF YOU DO THIS, or eat it once it's reasonably cooler, yet still warm, OR stick it in the freezer (like me) /fridge and eat it later.  
  
WASN'T THAT FUN.  
  
Drizzt: I thought you weren't supposed to talk.  
  
*silence*  
  
Drizzt: ...^^;; (WITH ELF EARS!!!! XD) Hey, wait one second...WHERE DID SHE GO?!?!?!?! OH MY MENZOBERRANZAN, THERE'S A WILD TBOTAKU LOOSE IN THIS HOUSE!!!!!! OH MY MENZOBERRANZAN!!!!!! *runs around scouting the area as he loves to do EVER so much...*  
  
Catti-Brie: (who just HAPPENS to suddenly appear...) Don't ye worry yer cute elfin little head. I found her chewing on this hideous-looking white sticky...thing.  
  
Drizzt: (relieved, but not showing it. Perhaps an influence of VINCENT?!?!?!?!! BOOHUHAA) Thank the gods. *looks at hideous-looking white sticky thing* I believe that is the Recipe.  
  
Catti-Brie: Dear gods help us all if word gets around on how you are supposed to make this godforsaken abomination.  
  
Drizzt: Err...But it's already all typed out and--  
  
Catti-Brie: !!!!!!!!!!!!!! DRIZZT DO'URDEN, PREPARE YOURSELF FOR PAIN!!!! I WILL BIND YOU TO A SPIKE AND--  
  
Drizzt: Hehee. Bondage!  
  
Catti-Brie: O_O *starts to blush terribly...*  
  
Moi: MY GOSH!!!! DRIZZT IS-- DRIZZT IS--  
  
(Everyone looks at Moi)  
  
Moi: *searches for a quick escape* TALL!!  
  
Catti: (Damn hard-to-type-for-me name...grmm grmm...) But he's not. What are ye talkin' about, girl? *looks at TBOtaku questioningly*  
  
Moi: Ehehehehee...Nothing!!! Nothingatall!!! Uh, WEE!!  
  
*sweatdropping commences*  
  
Drizzt: I believe that she is back to normal now. Shall we eat? *produces two plates with INCREDIBLY GORGEOUS Ultimate Rice Patty Sato Sato Du Laits*  
  
Catti-BireBroeBrie(toldya it was hard to spell...-_-;; ^_^;;): :O :D Ye gods!! Drizzt, I didn't know you could cook!  
  
Drizzt: Oh yes, I have many special talents...Hehee; "special talents"...  
  
Everyone: *groans* Where are the tomatoes?!?  
  
Drizzt and Catti-Brie: WHAT?!? WE WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT SWORDSMANSHIP--GAHH!! WE MEAN ARCHERY!! YEAH, ARCHERY!!!!!! GEE GOLLY, THAT ARCHERY!!!! ^_^;;;;; ^_^;;;;;  
  
[Suddenly, the camera zooms in to show the face and body down to the shoulders of TBOtaku. Dramatic "I'm Confused" music begins to play.]  
  
TBO: ;_; *Wants to write more, but doesn't want to rant for hours and get evil spam e-mails from unhappy readers...*  
TBO: *whimpers*  
  
Vincent: Don't worry. I'll protect you...  
  
TBO: O.O VINCENT!!!! WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?!?!?!?!  
  
Vincent: I'm here when you need me, baby!! *does a cool thing* (--wait...isn't that ALL the time?? WEEHEHEHEHE~!!!! ^_^ ^_^V)  
  
TBO: *swoons*  
  
TBO: Hehe!! Let's go, Vincent!! Lalalalala... "V^__^xV"  
  
*The two walk offstage together, hand-in-hand*  
  
*Drizzt and Catti-Brie are still busy eating and discussing their hair...or something.*  
  
THIS IS NOT THE END!!!! THERE WILL ME _MORE_ RECIPES!!!!!!!! WOOOHHAAAAAA  
  
And then there was...  
  
Food.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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9:06 PM (EDT) on Thursday, 11-15-2,001, TBOtaku wrote this Recipe. And created a whole new grammatical rule about the structure of sentences containing a TBO-style Recipe. And did a lot of other stuff, which we will not mention because it basically consists of her eating fruit while listening to Kiki's Delivery Service music. ^__^ ^_^= munch munch chomp chomp I love this producer!! I love this composer!! I LOVE THESE MOVIES!!!! :D :D  
  
Vincent: ...But what about me???  
Moi: *patpats* You too.  
Vincent: *tries to smile*  
Vincent: I still can't do it. Make Guardian make me do it!! *pouts*  
Moi: Stares in awe for a moment at Vincent. ...You pouted. YOU POUTED!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!! DAMN SEXY!!!!  
Vincent: Why thank you. I'm too sexy for this cloak, you know.  
Moi: I know.  
Vincent, Moi, Drizzt, and Catti-Brie: AND ON AND ON IT GOES!!!!!!!! "V^_^O"  
  
EVERYBODY SAY ULTIMATE RICE PATTY SATO SATO DU LAIT!!!!! DU-LAY!!!!!!!  
  
Ano hito no...mama iau tameni!! I don't know the lyrics, waah!! Arai Yumi, wai~!!!! ^^;; :D :D ^_^;;  
  
-TBO OUT!! FOR A TIME!!!! WOOOYARRR  
  
Super Jenah would say PIRATES!!!! YARR :-=  
  
(Finished rant 9:13 PM. On the same day, mind you!!)  
  
~Bwuu~  
  
~Bwaah~  
  
Please Review!! And not REVIEW, and not review, but Review........*TBO's voice (thank the gahds) fades out to the tune of Kiki's Delivery Service (the theme song) *  
  
I WANNA WRITE MORE!!!! DAMN!!!! Oh well~!! Wee, fruit!! ^_^ ^_^ :D D  
  
(Scary, ain't it. Yes, I know it is.)  
  
  
After three(...now it's FIVE...*squinty-angry-frustrated-like face* remove story/re-upload stories, I will now say this:  
...I was not allowed to put any squinty faces...Fan fic dot net is limiting my freedom to be squinty...;_;  
  
...Ya know, those faces!! + the opposite!! I CAN'T MAKE 'EM!!!! *SOBSOBSOBSOB*  
  
Okay, well, I go eat a chestnut now...yumyumyumyum and then go to sleep!! But not before reading more of PASSAGE TO DAWN!!!!! OH YEAH R.A. SALVATORE YOU GO, MAN!!!! YOU GO WRITE MORE, _WELL_, HEAR?!?!?! WOOWOOO~~~~ ^_^V" ^_~V"  
  
BruuBruuBruuBruuBruuuuuuuuuuuu~~~~~~~~ (9:56, after banana. Yesh.)  
  
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End file.
